Look Up

The second day of spring came with phenomenal weather. So I took it upon myself to go outside with the plan to do NOTHING. Which sounds so underwhelming but if you have seen my schedule the opportunity to do absolutely nothing does not come around as often as I would like it to.

There has been a stretch of time where my life felt full—but not in a way that meant anything. Just full of things to do, places to see, expectations to meet etc. I was moving constantly, checking things off, staying on top of everything… but I was not really present in any of it.

And the worst part is, I did not even realize it was happening.

But then we made it to the second day of spring, and somewhere in the midst of embracing the idea of nothingness, I looked up. And it felt unfamiliar.

Not because the sky had changed, but because I had. It felt like I was looking at something I had forgotten existed, even though it has been there the entire time. Still wide. Still constant. Still present in a way I hadn’t been.

Nothing in the world had shifted, but something in me had. I had gotten so caught up in everything that needed to be done that I stopped noticing what didn’t demand my attention—but still deserved it.

That is where this poem came from. Writing this was my way of admitting that—to myself more than anyone else. Of slowing down just enough to notice again.